Why?

Why?

It is indeed one of the most intriguing and fundamental inquiry about everything around us. It is the question that provokes a chain of thought processes in our mind. I believe this is the single most important question and the biggest reason behind almost all the inventions. Looking behind the discovery of many phenomena and inventions in the history of mankind, we can realize that the inventor was curious to find why something happened. Why did the apple fall towards the earth and not the other way around? Why do the planets revolve around the sun? Why do opposite poles attract? Why do you get attracted to the opposite sex? Why the small tin can got charged after lightning? Why the lid vibrated when the water started boiling? Why did it sparked when two rocks were rubbed against each other? Why is the sky blue? Why does it rain? Why does something smell bad? Why does it hurt when you poke with a pin? Why is fire hot?  Why why why why....

Many a times the questions seems so mundane and cliché. The sky has been blue since we started seeing it. Every little thing has been falling towards the earth from the beginning. It was made like that. Unless and until you go beyond the common thinking process, we won’t come up with an answer. For this we need to ask the right question and ask why the answer was that way. Why is it that the things have been falling down from the beginning? There you have your multibillion dollar question.

If you start with one of the question that pokes in your mind it starts off a chain of whys. For example: Why do I need go to college? To gain knowledge. Why do I want to gain knowledge? To get a good job. Why do I want a good job? So that I could earn a good living. Why do I need a good living? To have peace of mind. Why do I need peace of mind? To keep myself happy. Why do I need to be happy? So that I feel better. Why do you want to feel better?????..... 

It is a vicious circle or a never ending pursuit and it can go on for a while... It is hard to get to an end. May be trailing these never ending questions we could find the purpose of life and may be reason behind the universe. Even that is another "Why"? Why was this universe created? Every single entity around us has the ability to invoke that curiousness within us. Understanding the reason behind it amuses us. It gives logic to the wonder that the question pokes into our mind. I believe that is what makes mankind different; the free will and the ability to reason. Why should I choose this option and not the other one? Why does this option seem to be more pleasurable than the other option?

Still some of us don't think. We assume that things are like that. It is much easier to enjoy the phenomena and not think about it. It is easier to use a touchscreen and not think why it doesn’t work with a pen or a pointed stylus. A child asks that very same question to you and then you wonder why I haven’t thought of the same question. I have been using this gadget for a long time but it never occurred to me.

While growing up ourselves, we shed that inquisitiveness on the way somewhere. Every child grows up with an insatiable curiousness. The child wants to learn the meaning about everything. It reasons everything. Though the elders feel it to be stupid, as one of my professors said, there are no stupid questions. But there could be a stupid answer. On the contrary, I have seen many elders make fun of these "little queries". "How stupid of you to ask me that?" they say. And thus you create a barrier to the chain of thoughts. The child thinks it is indeed bad to ask such questions. I should probably be dumb enough to ask that question. He will think twice before asking the next question. The sheer inquisitiveness of a child is inhibited and as we grow older, we constrict our thinking to the simple daily chores. A child never gets bored. Even a piece of newspaper in waiting room makes him involved. He wonders what all he could do with that little piece. The magazines arranged in various ways become a small tent or a shed for him. The "little men" could find shelter under that. The moment we are stuck in a room for 5 mins, we get impatient. We don't analyse the room. We don't observe and ask a why question. We won’t even stop for a second to make a simple observation on the shoes of the fellow patient sitting in the lobby. May be that is why the older we get, the more we get bored.

A recent study shows that the major reason for Alzheimer’s disease is the lack of invigoration in the mind. The mind gets bored with the lack of activity. We think of mundane stuffs again and again, making only a small part of our brain active all the time. Another professor of mine used to say in his class to us. Every living creature on earth has got a specific feature that characterizes it. We could put them into individual boxes and cluster together. The moment the species fails to follow its “duty”, it doesn’t belong in this biosphere. The moment butterflies stop taking nectar from the flowers and induce pollination it doesn’t deserve to be in the food chain. For mankind it is the ability to think. Unless we use it, we don’t deserve to be in the “box”. We may better fit in a “primate’s box”. Indeed in many places in the Qur'an, the Almighty asks the reader 'do they not think,' 'do they not ponder,' or 'reflect'.  Unfortunately neither do we think nor do we enquire about the musings to those who are knowledgeable. 

A new begining

A fresh beginning, a fresh page and a fresh outlook... 

It’s been really long since I blogged. Call it laziness, being busy with the classes or being distracted with things around. Anyways it’s always better late than never for anything. So let me begin (again)...

It’s been a wonderful ride for the past 2 years. The next best thing after my life at NIT-Calicut, I would say. Quit my job at the PSU, got into a small business solution firm, quit the job again and started preparing again for my MBA. But this time I made sure that I won’t apply with any OBC certification. Got a good score with SNAP and finally ended up in a comparatively good place... "SIIB-Pune".

Loads to tell about the process, the place and what all happened after coming here. I will keep that for some other time. 

As a new beginning, I would like to keep things up to date, based on whatever is happening right now in my life, the musings in my little mind and things around. 

Ever wondered what a dog sees when a car comes towards it? I was thinking about it yesterday night.

Many a times have I been with a driver who tries to do a “hit and run” on a stray dog. I have seen a sadistic pleasure in their eyes while they try it. Poor thing, it has nothing to do but run for their life. Many a times it fails to see the vehicle that vrooms onto it from the other direction. Result: permanent limp for life or a smooth strike to the heavens. Yesterday something similar happened when I went for a jog nearby. A Tata Indica tried to do a "hit and run" on a little puppy. Thank God, the car didn't hit it... That is when it struck me about how the puppy would be seeing it as. It would be something different to look at it through the dog's eyes... Putting myself in it's shoes must be fun... 

You have no clue how the 4 wheeled monster scares the shit out of us. You never know whether they are dead or alive. Most of the time they lay dead on the road sides. But the moment one of those 2 legged creatures enter into one, it just invigorates itself into this new entity. Suddenly it starts to vroom, it makes this high pitch sounds when we come across on the tarmac and many a times doesn't even bother to knock us down. I don’t know what makes the entity so angry when the humans get into it. May be they both dwell on each other. Or maybe the bipods invented something like this to let off their anger. Cool though, to get out your anger, you get into one of the rolling monster and burst off your anger, knocking down anything and everything on their way. Way better than barking at the “bitch” who try to get into my territory on a cold night.

Or maybe it is a living being only comes to life when the bipod enters inside and switches it on. How does this thing moves beats me… must be like the snakes… but the snakes have their whole body on the ground? How come this monster’s eyes glow while rest of the beings receive light for vision? How come the monster makes a different sound when it cries (especially those highway ones with air horns, it drives me crazy)? 

It seems the bipods doesn't know how much this contraption irritates us. One one hand it gets this deviant pleasure from knocking us down. Also, these bipods don’t realize that we have a broader audible frequency range. Already they make all these crappy noises along with their machines and industries, also on top of that we need to listen to all those lower frequencies and higher frequencies that they don’t have a clue of.

It is one crazy life out there. Still we are nice to our masters. At least most of us are.  End of the day, it is them who feed us. In a way it is better to have a strategy in place. Obey the masters when they are cool and when they feed you. But get the hell out of their vicinity when they get into the monster and get all pumped up… Sadly not many thinks so well living next to the highways...

got soaked... time to dry off....

It's been long since i had checked my page and was elated wen i saw that someone (nazeeha) had visited the blogs and had commented on it... thnx for the comments, u really made my day...

It's been quite a while, I tried a lot of things... tried my luck at Event Management and I loved it... decided to read a lot of books but didn't work out that well... watched a lot of movies and happened to see some of the greatest movies of all times... got into the kitchen to "discover" my hidden talent and failed miserably (but can make some really good things now)... And finally on a day, last August, while working at End To End Marketing, I decided to try my hand at CAT again... Preparation went well, as I had become a master in everything related CAT (could call myself MCE: Masters in CAT Examination)... On a good side, I had my sister (cousin) also to prepare along with me... In August decided to quit the job and give my full concentration on my preparation... Also, feeling a bit wrong on my part, decided not to apply for Non Creamy Layer for this season... Appeared for 5-6 Entrance Tests and was waiting for the results to come... The results started coming and just like a movie being played over, no calls... To make things worse (at the family end), my sister got a 97.x percentile and me with a meager 77. As usual family started comparing... She did that , she did this.... the list goes on... As a final ray of hope, the results for SNAP turned out to be something better... The day b4 yesterday SIBM Pune shortlists came and all praise to Almighty, my name was there in the shortlist published for GD/PI...

Relieved more than happy...

There are more things to do now... got to prepare well and convert the call... Almighty willing, I will be there in the first shortlist...  

Read somewhere that it is good to blog to have a good flow of thoughts and this will help me in my GD... So starting from today, I will be blogging everyday (atleast for half an hour). The topics could be anything and will be grateful if u could post in the suggestions... Will come back at 9 at night to blog... till then bye

See you when I see you....

Left To Dry or To Fly

Finally, they terminated my job... I don't blame them, I would have done the same in such a situation. I never liked it in there. Maybe it's 'coz Civil Engineering has never been in my blood or coz I had a feeling that I don't belong in there. Why waste your time doing something you don't like?

Now I have got a new feeling... Like I am set free for the first time in my life... I am free as a bird , as a piece of paper (Mera jeevan kora khagas kora hi rahe gaya) as a piece of clothe hanging on a line out in the sun... I am not clipped, I am not pinned, neither am I spread on the floor with a heavy stone up on me. I AM FREE... But the sun is bright and harsh... it could drain me off... fade me... brittle me... but it's up to me whether to fly off or to lie in there... Winds are blowing... but none in my direction... After the results of some of the exams had come, makes me think whether the whole decision of being in b'lre was good or bad? IIFT results came, dint clear the cutoffs... SNAP came had a good score but in the end was never part of the competition... JMET came, cleared the cutoffs, still waiting for the shortlist... FMS results were out the dayb4 yestday, nowhere in the vicinity... still got two more to go... and CAT results to come... Its not that I ain't good with this stuff... If u compare my scores with the last years score, I would 've got atleast 5 calls by now... The standard of the paper haven't changed much also... But dont know why...

I am sure I wont be able to explain the enigma rite now... I ll 've to wait atleast two years to find the answer to the question. After that I could look back and say what I did was for the best or for the worst... But, something inside me says that it can't be all bad... after all i believed in my intuition ... Rite now, only thing I gotta believe is on the saying "A smooth sea seldom maketh a Great sailor"... Hope this episode makes me strong and bold enough to face other hails and storms in my future.

I know no one is out there reading this shit... but if u happen to read it Wish me good luck...

I don't want u to read this... If u know me then please don't read anymore... Its just because i can't take it anymore... today i feel like a 3 cm sapling with two leaves and a stem, looking for a ray of sunlight after a nuclear holocaust. waiting badly for a little light so that something positive could be synthesized within. I feel so lonely. like the whole world is against me. they don't want me to grow, they don't want to think o care about what i want. There was no one in the vicinity to pour some water of kindness. Everyone wanted me to be dead. They believe being dead is the best thing for me. I don't 've to fight for myself, I don't 've to wait for any sunshine or a drizzle to come my way, I don't 've to make myself grow in a way so that I get out of the shelter an wet myself in the rain. Finally I don't ve to LIVE.

Every person that i talked to today wanted me back in the shit hole. be DEAD an yet live. they want me to suffocate, choke, fill my lungs with the dark an black smoke so that they can see me HAPPY... Don't they see that if I am not happy being in that dungeon how the hell are they going to SEE ME HAPPY... I FEEL PATHETIC... I don't know if they are enjoying this part, I don't think they can conceal it that well either. Even people who doesn't even know what i want to be, find a hell of a pleasure suing me. I don't know... even the idea of comin home was a big mistake...

If u find me choked to death, pls don't look for any another motive... People around me want me dead...

Its just coz that i had read and heard about many ppl who had been in similar sit and that I believe that I 've some responsibility towards my being, I cant kill myself... But, if someone who can do that for me I would prefer that... being killed by a single stab with a knife is better than being choked by everyone else in the hall...

Beginners Luck

hi, this 'll be my first blog and with more than 100 million already in the running, i know it will be just like a bit in a 1 TB hard disk. But as we look around, we do realize that even a small dust does play a part in this world, even a flutter of a butterfly can cause a tornado on the other side of the world, its told that even a smallest positron can open up a universe of knowledge. So, as a humble beginning and as a path to realization for many things that i wanted to achieve in this life, let me begin...

In the name of Almighty the most Merciful and the Omnipresent.



PS: I know, not many will be reading this, but, whosoever does it, i request u to be generous with criticism and terse with praise...

zk